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Friday
Aug032012

Facebook Hypocrisy

Living in the liberal wasteland that is New England, it is fair to say that at least half of my friends are not conservative.  It is also fair to say that at least half of the liberal half are so far left of center that I wonder sometimes what holds our friendships together.

I try very hard not to let politics get in the way of those friendships; we do have common ground in other areas that are far more important, in the long run, than our political positions on the issues.  Some of us have actually made vows with each other that we don't discuss politics when we are alone together; in a crowd it can be different and even then we tend to circumspect.  Though I have been known to walk away from a conversation in a group that is veering into territory that is going to make my blood pressure rise and perhaps say something to a friend that I'd rather not.

These days that is not easy to do when you constantly hear people misquoting facts, following the gibberish that the MSM feeds like baby food to the masses or when they make statements that are outright falsehoods.

The Chick-fil-A controversy has certainly brought out the intolerance of my more liberal friends, especially one in particular.  She is, by her own admission, the most left-leaning person you will ever meet.  She gives a new definition to the word liberal.

We bonded over 20 years ago over good wine, great movies, needlework and the shared property line of our respective homes.  After all this time we have a friendship that is, supposedly, held together by the glue of memories.

She is very much in favor of gay marriage; in fact 75% of her Facebook posts are related to the topic.  And yesterday she put up the picture you see here...knowing full well my position on the issue as well as a handful of her other friends.

I confess I took it a little ... personally.  So I made a very calm, non-confrontational comment:

Are you serious?

I think I exhibited remarkable self-control, don't you?

At this point in my life while I would rather not lose a long-standing friend over political differences, the intolerance exhibited by people on this issue (and others) is enough to prompt me to rethink my commitment to our relationship.

Never one to back-down from a debate I fully expected her to have some kind of response, even if it was a private message.

She didn't disappoint me but her response was ... unexpected.

She simply deleted the post in Facebook.

Kind of like deleting a post on a blog because you don't like what someone said.  I found it to be underhanded and ...

... annoying.

Perhaps I was spoiling for a fight with her; spoiling to at least defend my position and try to get her to see that you can disagree with someone on something that is very close to your heart and not assume that the disagreement is more than it seems.

Like assuming I'm a homophobe because I support Chick-fil-A's owner's right to his own personal beliefs.  In fact I know that my friend believes I am against gay marriage when I have never actually stated publicly what my position is.  She assumes that because I questioned the timing of Obama's announcement about his "evolution" or that I support Chick-fil-A's First Amendment right to freedom of speech that I hate all homosexuals.

To those last 5 words - for the record and any potential future Google searches - I don't hate homosexuals.

I know - you really can't debate this issue with someone this far over the edge on it; they will never see anything but their own blind intolerance.

Which is laughable given that they are objecting to someone else's perceived ... intolerance.

Anyway, small potatoes I know; in the grand scheme of life this is just a blip on a very long road.

Still chaps my ass.

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Reader Comments (6)

She is, by her own admission, the most left-leaning person you will ever meet. She gives a new definition to the word liberal.

Heh. I didn't realize you knew The Second Mrs. Pennington... personally. I got my sensitive body parts caught in this wringer a couple o' weeks ago. It dawned on me, to my great amazement, that I don't LIKE that woman very much any longer. I'm also surprised at how "politics" spills over into so many other areas of life. It's pretty damned difficult to maintain a friendship with someone who's a self-described "liberal's liberal." My $0.02.

August 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBuck

My butt is beyond chapped. I'm so annoyed with that sorta thing that I feel like my behind has been sandpapered & sprayed with turpentine.

I lost a friend with the initial Obama campaign...she went so hog wild for it that she even became and "organizing fellow". I tried really hard, but I couldn't read her daily Hope & Change messages without feeling sick at my stomach. Daddy said never debate Religion or Politics with friends, or you won't have those friends for long and as with most things he's said, he was right on the money. >.<

August 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSnigs

It dawned on me, to my great amazement, that I don't LIKE that woman very much any longer.

Buck, there are 2 reasons I loved hearing this from you. First is that it's good for you not to like her anymore. And second...you were in my head and put my thoughts down. I have realized the same thing about these friends, though I do love one of their daughters very much (she has declared herself to be "Switzerland" in this mess and has already taken shit for it). Anyway....great minds are thinking alike once again.

Snigs, welcome to my tiny corner of the world. As you are the author of the BEST RANT EVER on this subject, I can only bow in humble gratification for your words.

August 5, 2012 | Registered CommenterKris

A day later (okay, okay, a little over 3 weeks late) to the party ... but serioulsy, I'm thinking some people REALLY need to get a life.

Actually, it's interesting, being my own version of Switzerland in your upcoming election (no skin in the game) and now FB friends with many Lexicans (including some I only became friends with so I could sign them up the Top Secret Neptunus Lex FB page) and friends with some American Liberals .... it really does seem like some pple (dare I say on both sides) post things just itching for a fight. I do my best to bite my tongue (not really any of my business) although I have made the occasional *innocent* comment/ asked the occasional *innocent* question (much like yours) when I think someone has really went over the top. So far no one has got blown out of water. Yet. :D

But to trash a true friendship over something like that (I've read your previous post with the comment she made to you) is really sad. And even more sad for the kid involved. My best advice to you (not that you asked for any) ... breathe in, breathe out. Some people just aren't worth the trouble. Problem is that it sometimes takes a long time before you figure that out. :(

August 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

Michelle- wise words (of course). I have been breathing in and out for a couple of weeks now. :-) In the moment it was pretty awful and now I see that what I thought was a friendship was merely convenient ... for them. As I stated in the other post you read, it turned out the frienship was far more work going in than benefit coming out. And in the end...some people just aren't worth the effort. In fact the entire family has "gone dark", which I kind of expected. Sad that they would be willing to terminate a friendship over what amounts to a political issue that will fade away come November.

August 20, 2012 | Registered CommenterKris

Comment removed by site owner due to incredibly personal contents.

August 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDebra

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